Sometimes I wonder how much Mia remembers about Thailand. Does she remember life in Thailand, her foster mom, etc. One thing is definite - she loves Asian food above the rest and in true Thai form, she likes it spicy. Although pizza and anything with ketchup are winners too - and I do mean anything, including just a spoon with ketchup. Ugh!
A few weeks ago I was preparing a package for her foster mom and had over 100 pictures out trying to decide what to send. She regularly sees pictures of her foster mom around our house, but the picture that caught her eye was the one of her birth mother holding her. Also in the picture was her grandmother. She stared at this picture for the longest time. It was one of those "Mom moments" where I should have all the right things to say. As a parent one thing I've learned is I am human and having all the answers to every possible scenario isn't realistic and I won't hold myself to that level. So I left her look at the picture for a very long time and then said, do you see your birthmother and grandmother. So pretty. That's Mia's birthmother; That's Mia's grandmother and repeated it with her Thai nickname. They are in Thailand. Tell them Sawadeekah and wai. She smiled, we both put our hands together and she said KeeKah. I'm sure that was WAY over her head, but she moved on to other pictures so I either answered a question or confused the heck out of her!
Last weekend a Korean mom and her Korean son walked into a gym. Mia stared at them for the longest time. I tried to distract her but nothing worked. She stared. So that left me wondering again about the day with the pictures. When we first arrived home, she stared at anyone with darker skin than us, but it's been a while since she did this. I wish we had more diversity in our area so that she would realize there are a lot of people in the world and we don't all look the same.
So I wonder what's going on in that little head... She definitely thinks we are great and loves us, but I'm not sure what else is going on in there. I don't think anyone is dwelling on it. Guess I better start on that life book! Google's next project...
5 comments:
When you figure out the answer to this question, I want to know too. We wonder the same thing all the time.
T, who loves all foods, devours Thai food, devours it. (He is a BBQ sauce fan though, not ketchup).
When looking at pictures's of his FM, he no longer calls her Ma. He refers to Pat as Ma now, which is a little bit confusing.
He is frequently around Asian women but he still stares too. Sometimes he likes to get up close and stare, like invasion of personal space close. I have to tell the other moms, oh, he just thinks you're pretty. Funny thing is, they always are. He can pick them already!
Thank you for sharing this post and the ways you are trying to connect Mia to her birth family. I love the fact that you have a picture of her with her birth mother and grandmother. What a treasure! I love the Thai words and wai. So cute and important for her. Praying for your little Mia and my little one still in Thailand waiting to come home.
Thanks for sharing this moment. I know we all are anxious about doing the "right thing" when adoption-related issues come up. It sounds like you are handling it will grace, showing love and respect for Mia's birth family. What a precious thing that you have that picture!
I think about this all of the time. When we get our Daughter, when is she going to ask questions and what will we say. I think you handled it really well. I sent you a pm on the Holt Thailand forum. I don't know if you got it or not. Kelli (Annabel29)
Terri, where have you gone? Hope everything has been good with the move.
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